Oct 4th - Pretty good day today

Today was considerably better then yesterday.

Yesterday morning started off on the wrong foot when I tried to do my neupogen injections in my thighs. The first one burned like crazy (not sure why) and the second one I totally messed up and couldn't seem to get right. I know it sounds like it should be easy, but I think I make myself nervous and then I freeze up.

I called my doctor's office and explained the problem and felt like even more of an ass for not being able to give myself a couple of shots to the leg.

I spent most of the day feeling very nauseous and didn't get out of bed much. Plus as an added bonus, those lovely shots are starting to make my back feel like it was run over by a steam roller. So I must be getting some of the meds in me :|

But this morning, I got up and did my shots with condfidence, they went perfectly and didn't even sting as much. I was relieved and now I feel like it's "mind over matter" and I just have to tell myself that I can do it (no matter how cliche that sounds) and it won't be a problem for me anymore.

Also, I felt much less nausous today that yesterday so I was able to eat really well. And I think when you get good food in you, it automatically makes you feel better all around. It seemed like my head wasn't in such a fog today.

The only bad news was that my visiting nurse that was supposed to come to the apartment today to show me how to care for my catheter never showed up. It was really important that she came today cause the flushing needed to be done today. But I'm proud of myself. Instead of freaking out, I read the little booklet a million times and I went ahead and did it all by myself. (Well my aunt was here to talk my through it, I mean without "professional help")

I am going to try to keep up my confidence cause I really think that attitude is extremely important when you are going through anything tough in life. So all things considered, today was a good day.

It's wierd how my definition of "good day" has changed so much.