March 3rd - Out after 43 days

They finally let me go on Tuesday. I would have gotten out sooner but I got some sort of infection and spiked a fever right before my planned discharge.

It feels nice to be out. I still have to stay in the city until next week. My doctor required that I remain close by, should anything go wrong, plus I had a follow up appointment on Thursday. The hotel I'm at is right across the street from Sloan Kettering so it is very convienent. My aunt is here keeping me company and running all of the errands (I'm not allowed out in public anywhere, not even a grocery store).

At my follow up yesterday, I made a pretty big decision. I decided to take part in a clinical trial. I had been made aware of this trial from the beginning and was tossing it back and forth whether or not to take part. It's a phase 3, double-blind, placebo controlled study, using a drug that they believe may help prevent relapse in those high at risk (unfortunatly that would be me). The drug has already been determined to be safe, it is chemotherapy drug called SGN-35. Even though it is a chemo, it's supposedly very mild with little if any side effects.

To take place in the study, I have to come back to Sloan Kettering for one day, every three weeks, for a year. They will give me either the drug, or the placebo over the course of a few hours. As I was trying to make my final decision whether or not to take part, the doctor said to me, "Look,this is the closest thing to an insurance policy I have to offer." I think that's what sold it to me. They will reimbuse me for my travel and I can quit the study anytime. But it is still a big commitment, and the possibility that I get the placebo instead of the drug itself frusterates me.

Desipite all of the problems I had in the hospital, I am doing quite well now. Much more tired then usual, but I feel pretty good. Doctor is very pleased with my counts and how well I'm doing. So I start the clinical trial on Monday. Let's hope I get the drug and not the placebo so I can up my chances of a cure!